Quick quiz! When your get within two feet of your child they feel...
A) Safe, loved, and seen.
B) Nothing, they're too absorbed in their phone and it drives me crazy!
C) On edge, impatient, or annoyed.
Most of the time when we talk about Executive Function - we are talking about getting stuff done (executing).
But long before you can help your kid develop the mindsets, habits, and systems to get stuff done, you MUST develop the type of relationship that
Dear parents, How do we get kids to change their habits? To create more functional routines? How do we get them to think for themselves, to plan ahead, to get organized, and to get stuff done even if they don't feel like it? How do we encourage kids to act in their best long-term interest? If we take away the details and look at the heart of these questions, we'll see that what we're really asking is, "How can we help kids act less impulsively and delay their gratification?"
Dear parents, I've had the benefit of observing, interviewing, and consulting thousands of families as an academic and executive function coach over the course of the last decade. The model I review in this video is one that I developed after observing how countless families react to common problems that come up when their child has executive functioning issues. Here are some of the most common issues that kids who struggle with executive functioning experience: Lack of pati
Dear parents, When your child is being oppositional, disrespectful, or acting on an emotional impulse in a heated moment, how do you respond? Do you give in to your own impulse to act on your emotions? Or can you model emotional self-regulation and impulse control in that moment? The main message here is that it's important to lead with your actions above all else. If you're trying to teach your child how to inhibit their impulses, then they absolutely need you to model how y
*Join me at CHADD-SFV's next Peer-to-Peer or Parent group linked here: https://www.meetup.com/CHADD-SFV/ *Join a private, online Adult, Teen, and/or Parent group on Facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/CHADDSFV/ *Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org Dear Parents, The most frustrating part about having ADHD is that no matter how much I READ, LEARN, and UNDERSTAND about it, I still find it INCREDIBLY challenging to be mindful of my habits. Very often, I will repeat the sa
Dear parents, Today I want to explore what it means to love unconditionally. To quote Marriage and Family Therapist, Dr. John Amodeo: "Children need to be loved without conditions. As they struggle through life, we need to be unendingly patient — taking many deep breaths, and offering guidance repeatedly. Embodying a consistently loving, accepting presence, we create a climate for safe attachment." - Psychology today You can learn more about Attachment Theory here, but the ba
Dear parents, If you're not yet familiar with my Alpha Parent Model, I encourage you to download this PDF guide that breaks it down. Or read it here on my blog (the link opens in a new window). In this video, I walk you through the nine MindFull Principles that I practice in order to navigate the executive functioning challenges that with ADHD and anxiety. These are the same principles that help my clients to master their executive functioning skills so that they can become c
'Alpha' is the first letter of the Greek alphabet, just like 'A' is the first letter of the English alphabet. To be an alpha means to go first or to take the lead. An alpha parent is one who takes the lead and who models the behavior that they would like their child to reflect. This fascinating bit of neuroscience will help you appreciate just how much of you your child reflects. Italian neurophysiologist, Giacomo Rizzolatti, and his colleagues at the University of Parma were
I've been meaning to Vlog on this topic for a while now, because this really is such a common thread among most (if not all) of the families I coach. This mistake is so widespread, I think, because parents make it with the best intentions in mind. Yet, they lack the awareness of how this one mistake is damaging their relationship with their child. This mistake is overfunctioning. Overfunctioning is like a weird, self-reinforcing feedback-loop that keeps parents stuck in a cyc
Check out SFV CHADD's upcoming parent support group on Wed, Feb 27 @7pm. I really tried making this a SHORT video but it was a difficult task because Dr. Brown's talk was so packed with insights and examples of how emotions affect individuals with ADHD. I left out the entire portion where he talked about medication and about the 10 common myths about ADHD (something I'll cover in a future video). So, despite the length (21 minutes), I hope you watch all the way through becaus
Parents, Is your child is stuck in a vicious cycle of failure? Are they failing a class, several classes? Failing to keep their backpack organized? Failing to turn in their work? Failing to brush their teeth most nights? Failing to "launch" in general? In this week's Vlog, I summarize three of the most powerful take-aways that I got from Michael Delman M Ed. in his workshop where he shares the stories and tools from his new book - Your Kid's Gonna Be OK: A Guide to Raising a
Elaine Taylor-Klaus is a certified coach, author, and co-Founder of Impact ADHD, and co-creator of Sanity School. This week she hosted a workshop called "Why are you yelling? Taming the Triggers and Turning the Family Volume Way Down." In this Vlog, I walk you through her four step process for taming your triggers and explain why and how it works to radically shift the energy in your home. Here are the four steps: 1. Recognize the threat
2. Reclaim your brain
3. Choose a pe
Parents, how many times has this happened to you? It's a weekday morning, you've got a few minutes to get out the door to get to school on time, and your child simply refuses to put on their jacket, or their shoes, or do some other super simple task. And no matter what you do or say, they JUST WON'T LISTEN... This can be SO frustrating and overwhelming, and for many parents, this is a recurring morning hassle. This video is a response to an email I received from Chelsea, mom
This week's video is about the very important skill of dealing with disappointment, sadness, or being emotionally dysregulated. I have to admit, for the last few days I've been dealing with my deep disappointment with the Supreme Court nomination process. I won't go into details here, that's not what this Vlog is about. Instead, I wanted to talk about sadness, disappointment, and failure. How do you deal with things when they don't go your way? How do you get comfortable with
Watch this short video to learn the top four reasons parents give me for yelling at their kids. Learn how it affects the development of their child's executive functioning. PS, lots of yelling and arguing can be attributed to issues surrounding school. If your student struggles to keep up with their academics or tasks, download my super practical 3-Part Executive Functioning Guide written specifically for parents of struggling students:. #ExecutiveFunction #VLOG #Yelling #Emo
The transition from summer vacation to a new semester of school definitely triggers a lot of emotions for both parents and kids. A major theme last week in my meetings with parents was how to stay emotionally regulated while their child acts out emotionally. Most of the parents I meet admit that they frequently act out of their own frustration when their child is acting out; that It's really difficult to stay calm, especially when you are rushing through a busy day. In this s
In this video, I talk about a the very common theme of procrastination. I’ll review: 1. Three common beliefs that cause us to procrastinate. 2. Three hacks to overcome those beliefs. 3. The “One Minute” rule I follow to help me beat procrastination everyday. I’m a master procrastinator. I have spent a lifetime figuring out ways to either delay or avoid tasks I don’t feel like doing. I like to think of procrastination as “malfunction” in one of the five steps of executive func